Sick and Tired

I spent the better part of two days sleeping.  If only it had been just because instead of because I felt like I'd been hit by a mac truck!

Tuesday I felt a bit tired.  Wednesday I didn't actually pull myself out of bed until around 3 in the afternoon (well, I got my middle one off to school and then crashed again).  Around 3:00 pm I drug myself downstairs to watch the little one play and promptly fell back asleep on the couch.

After snoozing there for a bit, I woke to find a wonderfully cozy dinner consisting of grilled cheese and tomato soup (thanks to my dear hubby).  After enjoying that, I trudged back upstairs and back to bed.  I read books to the little one and then snuggled with her while we both fell asleep (promptly around 7:00 pm).

Hubby got the middle one off to school this morning, and hung with oldest and littlest until he left for work.  I rested more this morning, hoping that the throbbing in my head would eventually decline.  It did, sort of and I have felt a bit better throughout the day.  I actually went to a massage therapist today because I was aching so much.  She worked on my upper body the entire time.  I carry stress much too well across my shoulders.

I google-chatted with a dear friend for a bit (which is always refreshing).  Found myself and little one a simple dinner (the big kids must fend for themselves as hubby is away at work) and then tucked myself away in my room.

I took a bit of time for drawing before bed tonight.  I read a bit more in the drawing book and practiced on the next activity (working with noticing lines, curved and straight, in your surroundings).  It was fun.

I think I've decided not to color my hair any more.  I'm sick and tired physically, but more than that I'm sick and tired of messing with the color in my hair.  I really miss my old color.  I loved the color of my hair and never once wanted to change it or highlight it.  I colored my hair for one reason and one reason alone, to cover the gray.  It has bugged me ever since.  I felt so fake.  I know this is just me and lots of people color their hair and absolutely love it.  But me, I always felt fake and frustrated at myself for not having the courage to just be me.  Popular youth-loving culture be damned.  ;)

I've decided to try to let all the color grow out.  I really don't want to cut my hair short, so I'm going to see if I can handle the growing out process, and just trim a little at a time.  We'll see.  Hopefully I won't need anyone to hold me accountable aside from myself, but again we'll see.  So, my journey toward a more authentic me begins.  Yikes!